Day 26: Character

Name three fictional characters you relate to.

Well, I’ve already covered two here. I have a thing for villains I suppose, but really, the self-destructive behavior that I relate to, the loneliness, the abandonment, have come from a deeper archetype that at least Hook can be said to resemble in his character makeup. There is no greater tragic heroine or symbol of the abandoned and used. So, after my beloved Captain Hook and the Evil Queen, the third answer would have to be Ophelia.

I know that I mirror this pattern at the very least in all of my intimate relationships. They tend to turn into the be all and end all. I want them to be the one so much that I ignore everything else, lose myself, defend their intentions and in the end, usually end up letting them kill me on the inside because I wouldn’t heed anyone else’s warning. In the midst, my every thought is bent on it, looking for fractures and then talking myself out of them, or feeling the pain of them as though they’ve already happened. It really is enough to drive someone mad. It’s a bit like your mind making up scenes for itself and then acting them out as if they were really happening. It finds some minute anecdotal evidence and runs with it. That’s sort of another story…

Briefly I relate to, the Queen, getting older and fearing her younger replacement, Hook, being wounded and left all alone, and Ophelia, losing her already shaky place in the world, devalued by every man in her life she looked to. They are all models of what I can become if I don’t reign in my moods and reactions.

The queen is full on wrath and comes to the surface when I’m angry.(That heart collection starts to look enticing…) Hook is my loneliness and pining for understanding. He’s wounded and then turns on a dime to anger. (I’ll make you feel something for what you’ve done to me and for mocking me on top of it!). Ophelia is the hopelessness. The loss of the envisioned future that was probably all in her imagination to begin with; the sinking I feel when that realization of loss hits and the depression comes on and the seeking out of that outcome.

My list isn’t so cheerful when you look but that all have their fabulous side. The Queen is beautiful and has mad magic skills. Hook has style and deep feeling, which I love. Ophelia has a determination and a courage to look head on into what Hamlet couldn’t, even if it wasn’t healthy. Gloomy gloom, gloom. One day I may find someone who mirrors my droll side. I’m sure there are many if I look. At one time, I was an angry anxious mess in the vein of Basil Fawlty, but without the hi-jinks. I love Black Adder, though  am hopefully not that mean, Abby Normal in the Christopher Moore novels is frightfully close in her style and dryness, but for now, these are the three. I’ll pick up the jokes on another day.

Day 22 – Sweet Villainy

What fictional character in a movie, tv show, or book do you identify with and why? On to a juicy one. As every one of my friends knows, I have always had a thing for the villains.  It seems odd, I know, to go straight to baddies when asked who you identify with, but there really is a good reason, besides I never think of villains as bad per se. A villain is simply someone who’s had their happy ending taken away, and who grows increasingly desperate in their means to reacquire it. We all want the hero to win to make the world better but we rarely identify with him. Everyone loves a good villain because they’ve been damaged, hurt, and forever changed by it. Everyone can relate to someone else’s pain, can’t they?

As usual, I’m torn between two answers. The first is Queen Regina from Once Upon a Time, aka the Evil Queen. Since my son started calling me Regina, and my ex-husband jumped on that bandwagon, I’ve been paying attention to her story. She’s lonely, wounded and trying so hard to be better for her son. That does strike a chord, plus she can actually shoot fireballs from her hands and keeps boxes of hearts, who wouldn’t love that? Ok, maybe it’s only me… Something about getting older as a woman also makes that character resonate in the classical Snow White sense and really, I wouldn’t mind keeping specimen hearts in jars somewhere. Yes, I do watch Oddities now that you ask.

However, like Highlander, there can be only one and the character closest to my heart (was that a bad pun?) has to be my beloved Captain Hook. In this case, it is NOT the Once Upon a Time version, nor the Disney. Everyone who knows me is familiar with my Hook obsession. I gave a good amount of my arm for a tattoo of him so that should say something. Given the way he’s usually portrayed, that may seem like a bizarre choice but when I read the original book to my son. I found a character I didn’t entirely recognize or expect. 

Firstly, I love his style. I grew up in a house that was all about the velvet drapes and gold scroll work. That ornate classical style reminds me of something I lost when I left my childhood home for my father’s more minimalist style. My place now, with a little more work, could be Hook’s captain’s quarters. If I could explain how much velvety drapery and gold is going on in my apartment, well, it would be obvious why I love the man’s extravagance.

Secondly, Hook has a temper to be sure, but he’s an extremely lonely character; brilliant and tormented by an immature boy who cares nothing about the damage he’s caused. He is most often described in the book as melancholy. He feels all alone, even around his crew because they don’t understand him. He talks to himself, deflated, because he’s so terribly alone. He’s been injured, lost something vital to him and is left to deal with the fallout. In that way, anyone who’s been left to pick up the pieces after being injured by someone indifferent to the injury they’ve caused can relate to him…you know like that guy who broke your heart and was out partying the next day and moved on like you never existed? You know how you were tempted to slash his tires and lay waste to his truck like Carrie Underwood sang about? You just wanted him to feel something like you felt, right? (Or kind of like how my husband left me alone with a kid to raise and flitted around like a demon sprite with no responsibilities…Yeah, like that) He simply wants recognition for his loss. Instead, he has his attacker flaunt his victory and freedom at every opportunity with no remorse and worse, a cocky pride. If you’ve ever tried to get someone who doesn’t care feel something for what he’s done to you, well, that’s all Hook is trying to do and as a reward, he’s portrayed as a villain for doing so. 

Lastly, he’s an example of duality. Here is a character who was well-educated, elegant, and well-spoken. He was an Etonian and a PIRATE! It doesn’t get more rebellious than that. In that way, he’s totally punk rock. I’ve never seen Hook as a villain. I see him as the book says, a not wholly un-heroic character who is tragic in his way. I can guarantee I’m the only one who can’t watch his demise without tears, especially with a pile of creep children cheering on the crocodile, but that’s alright with me. If no one else can relate, I have my lonesome companion in print and under my skin reminding me to let go and disengage, reminding me of what I can become if I don’t and where it leads. At the very least he reminds me that I really need some cooler coats.